告丧与奔丧

二、告丧与奔丧

人死之后，要将死信告知于众，这叫告丧。帝王驾崩，朝廷派专使讣告诸侯和天下百姓;大臣去世，应首先通报朝廷;平民死后，家人要告知亲戚和乡里邻居。

古代丧礼对民间的告丧、奔丧和吊唁有许多规定。长辈死后，子女应立即通知亲朋好友。重要的亲戚还要派专人或是孝子亲自前往去告丧，一般则发书面讣告，该习俗一直沿用至今。如：

◆ 次早，着几个家人小厮满城去报丧，族长严监生，领着合族一班人来吊孝。都留着吃酒饭，领了孝布回去。赵氏有个兄弟赵老二在米店里做生意，侄子赵老汉在银匠店扯银炉，这时也备个祭礼来上门。僧道挂起长幡，念经追荐。赵氏领着小儿子早晚在柩前举哀，伙计、仆从、丫鬟、养娘，人人挂孝，门口一片都是白。(吴敬梓《儒林外史》第六回)

The next morning servants went through the town announcing the funeral．Yen Chen-hsien，the leader of the clan，came with the other relatives to mourn，and they were kept to a meal and given white linen for mourning．The widow had a brother who worked in a rice shop and a nephew who worked the bellows for a silversmith，and they brought mourning gifts too．Buddhists and Taoists hung up long banners，chanted their scriptures and performed the funeral rites; while the widow and her little son wailed morning and evening before the coffin．All the stewards，men-servants and maidservants were in mourning，and thehouse and gate were draped in white．(杨宪益、戴乃迭译)

◆ 一日到了都门，先奔入铁槛寺。那天已是四更天气，坐更的闻知，忙喝起众人来。贾珍下了马，和贾蓉放声大哭，从大门外便跪爬进来，至棺前稽颡泣血，直哭到天亮喉咙都哑了方住。尤氏等都一齐见过。贾珍父子忙按礼换了凶服，在棺前俯伏，无奈自要理事，竟不能目不视物，耳不闻声，少不得减些悲戚，指挥众人。(曹雪芹《红楼梦》第六十二回)

And upon reaching the capital they went straight to Iron Threshold Temple．It was then the fourth watch and the watch-men，hearing them，aroused everyone in the place．Jia Zhen alighted and with Jia Rong wailed aloud，both advancing on their knees from outside the gate to where the coffin was resting，kowtowing and lamenting all the way．They went on wailing till dawn，but which time their voices were hoarse．

Madam You and the others all came to meet them．Then Jia Zhen and his son，having changed into mourning according to the rites，prostrated themselves before the coffin．However，since they had business to attend to which they could not ignore，they had to curtail their mourning in order to issue instructions．(杨宪益、戴乃迭译)

【注】“稽颡泣血”：叩头至地，悲痛哭泣。如有特殊原因不能奔丧，则应寄物凭吊，居家服丧，表示对远方死者的哀悼。为官者若逢亲戚亡故，一般应去职奔丧，若遭父母亡故，则必须离职归家奔丧，否则被视为大逆不道，为世人所不容。

死者入殓下葬之前，得知死信的亲朋好友应携带“赙仪”(向办丧事的人家送的礼)到其家吊唁。如果因为贫穷不能提供赙仪者，则帮助干活，以力相助。奔丧吊唁者至，死者的子女要分别在村旁、屋外叩头跪迎。

民间对吊唁还有一些禁忌。人们对那些非正常死亡者，亲朋好友一般不会去奔丧，否则会招致灾祸。另外，青壮年男子不宜吊唁年轻女子，年轻女子也不宜吊唁青壮年男子，否则会被视为“过情之举”，受人耻笑。