第三节 问题的实质
我们都是中国人,却要使用英语作为工作语言(本课程定位的应用场景)。这就需要区分两个大方向:英译汉与汉译英。
英译汉的实质是阅读;没有看懂也就不大容易译对(译好则更多地联系着汉语的应用能力)。与此同时,阅读的实质又是英译汉;人们在阅读英语文章的同时,会不知不觉地做着英译汉的工作。实际上,国内的许多课程——从精读到泛读,从听说到各种“专业课”,课堂上与语言学习直接相关的教学方式往往包含了英译汉。
另一方面,汉译英的实质是写作;使用英语写作如果不够好,也就不可能译对译好。与此同时,英语写作的实质又是汉译英;我们在使用英语写作的同时,会不知不觉地做着汉译英的工作。实际上,国内的一些英语写作课程——从外贸函电到“高级商务写作”,课堂上的主要教学方式便是先英译汉(阅读范文),后汉译英。
两个大方向的实质都是英语水平问题:英译汉时,需要真正看懂英语原文,汉译英时,必须使用起码正确的英语。
这么做个粗略的区分之后,应当指出与本书编撰理念密切相关的一些个人判断:人的阅读能力强,容易感觉已经读懂了;英译汉的时候,没有看懂也就那么译了交了;与此同时,汉译英的时候,许多人没有使用起码正确的英语,但也就那么译了交了。
如此几年下来,看得见的是许多门课程的分数,还不错;看得见的还有高招录取通知书和毕业文凭,很好很爽。但在这里,为了你学会汉译英的本领,不得不说的是:一直以来,许多人没有译对,另外一些人没有译好,而这看不见,平时也懒得想。
于是,需要提请注意一个事实,这便是问题的实质:英语不是中国教师的,而是英美澳加等国家的人们的;在我们而言,英语是一门外语——即便从幼儿园就已开始学习,它仍然是一门外语;学英语不是为了高考成功和通过大学课程的,而是为了用于自己谋生、企业高效营销、机构正常运转的;我们使用英语不是为了简单的表达(由着自己说),而是为了与外国人交流信息、沟通观点,甚至是为了向他们争取利益的,因而需要讲求沟通效益和交际效果,与看懂文章(阅读)所需的英语知识大不相同。
这么想通了,什么是正确的汉译英也就不言而喻了。汉译英的本质不应当是已知单词的堆砌,不应当是此前所记单词的默写,而应当套用英美澳加人已经使用多年的语言,不应当是“信马由缰”,而应当是“照猫画虎”,在词语层面上是复制我们学过的英语词语,在句型层面上是复制我们学过的英语语法结构,但必须是正确的词法和句法。下面请看几个例句。
例11 宁波是全国十大外贸城市之一。
D1. Ningbo is one of top ten commercial cities in Chinese mainland.
D2. Ningbo is one of the top ten foreign trade cities.
D3. Ningbo is the top ten cities that major in foreign trade.
D4. Ningbo is one of Top 10 Foreign-Trade City in China.
D5. Ningbo is a “Ten-Largest-Foreign-Trading-City” of the whole country.
C1. Ningbo is the tenth largest foreign trading city of China.
C2. Ningbo is one of the ten largest foreign trade cities in China.
C3. Ningbo City is one of the top ten foreign trade cities of China.
译文D1的黑体部分有个政治问题(political issue);外国有人会那么写,国内学生最好不要——更多解释请见第六章例43项下。D2和D3都没有地域限定词;在一个外国人看来,容易联系到“全世界”的范畴,属于重大漏译。
原文“全国十大外贸城市”不是专有名词,中国任一机构或个人都可以这么说,但是若像D4和D5那样采用大写形式的英语文本,极容易引起误会——确认之前会受到误导,确认之后会认为我方撒谎。这是比较典型却又容易忽视的“跨文化交际问题(cross-cultural communication fallacies)”。
例11的C类译文是外国读者可以理解的,只是语意内容毕竟仍然是商务沟通中的信息失真。A类译文采用了“枝形吊灯”(第十章)的句型,将“全国十大城市”和“外贸”分开来讲,语意得当,层次清楚,宣传效果会更好一些。
B. Ningbo is one of the leading foreign trading cities in our country.
A1. Ningbo is said to be one of “the ten largest” cities of China in foreign trade.
A2. Ningbo is one of the 10 Chinese cities that are the biggest foreign traders of the country.
A3. Ningbo, Zhejiang, is one of the 10 Chinese cities with the largest volumes in foreign trade.
例12 近期黄金价格不断上涨,吸引了大批新的黄金投资者入市。
D1. With gold price higher recently, more new gold-investors are attracted to invest in stock market.
D2. The increasingly upraising gold rate currently has attracted many new investors enter the market.
D3. Rising price of gold recently attracted a large number of new gold investors | enter the market。
D4. The rising price of gold recently attracted large quantities of new gold investors entering the market.
D1属于“语意”失误,皆因一个stock。其余三个D类译文共同的问题是直译了“吸引……入市”两个动词,结果有违英语语法。前两个A类译文利用了介词,A3则改变了叙述角度。译文B2是D3的修改版。
B1. Recently, the sharply rising gold price attracts lots of new gold investor.
B2. Rising price of gold recently attracted a large number of new investors who have entered the gold market.
A1. The recent rising gold price is luring many new investors into the gold market.
A2. Recent rise in gold price has drawn a large number of new investors to the gold market.
A3. Attracted by the rising price of gold, investors are flooding the precious metals market.
例13 整个高新技术产业中,计算机及通信设备制造业占到了80%左右。
D1. Manufacturing businesses for computer and communication equipment account for 80% of the entire high- and new-tech industry.
D2. Conputer and communication apparatus | manufactuning industry occupies about 80% in entire hi-tech industry.
译文D1的黑体介词选择不当,致使语意大变。改为in或of或在for之后增加making或producing会好一些,但又与句首的manufacturing重复。D2拼写错误较为明显,其他黑体词属于照搬词典,显得好像是机器翻译。
C1. Computer and communication devices manufacturing account for about 80 percent of whole high-tech sector.
译文C1的第一处黑体应当是粗心所致,A1和A2都是其修改版。
C2. Computer science and telecommunications equipment manufacturing industry basically make up 80% of the entire high-new technology industry based on export value.
C3. Computer manufacturing industry and telecommunications equipment manufacturing industry made up to 80 percent of the total high-tech industry according to the market value.
B. In the entire high-tech industry, manufacturing of computers and telecommunication equipments accounts for about 80%.
C3中industry一词出现了三次;应当是单词直译的结果。暂借这个译文提示一句:平时阅读英语报刊文章时留意一下,这样的现象的确罕见,今后汉译英和英语写作中尽量避免——这便是本节的主题。B则是句型上照搬了汉语原文,译文因而显得有点迂。
A1. Computer and communication devices manufacturing accounts for about 80 percent of the high-tech sector.
A2. Manufacturing of computers and communication devices accounts for about 80 percent of the high-tech industry.
A3. Computer and communication equipment manufacturing accounted for about 80% ofthe high-tech industry (of China).
A4. Manufacturing of computer and communication equipment accounted for about 80 percent of the high-tech industry.
A5. Manufacturing of computers and communication equipments accounts for about 80 percent of China’s high-tech industry.
希望读者能够真正意识到:汉译英是一门需要学习的手艺,又是一门需要创新的艺术;只有动机强烈才肯真正看看书,假如不肯看书不做练习,则必定会继续大批量生产这里罗列的D类和C类译文。联系第一节的主题来讲,“认真对待”本身不是方法,却是贯穿整个汉译英过程的、最终能否做到译对译好的必要前提。
只是从绝大多数例句的大多数译文来看,许多人把翻译当作一份作业来完成,只凭头脑中现有的英语知识,写完就交了。对于简单的句子也许可行,但若打算代表中国企业和机构去与外国人博弈,现有的知识储备亟需加强,现有的英语应用能力尚需提高。
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